Derby High Grad Publishes Memoir To Help Others Struggling

Nicole Rizzo, 21, just published a memoir detailing how she dealt with an eating disorder and body issues growing up in Derby.

DERBY– If Nicole Rizzo could change one thing about society, she’d want the only body type that’s in’ to be the one that makes you comfortable in your own skin.

Rizzo, a 2018 graduate of Derby High School, and avid long-distance runner, didn’t always feel that way about herself.

In her new memoir, Running on Thin Ice,” Rizzo opens up about her struggles with an eating disorder and obsession with exercising. Her goal is to raise awareness about mental health among young girls, who are often inundated with media messages glorifying impossible beauty standards and body types.


At 21 years old, Rizzo said she is okay talking about her mental health. Back during her preteen and teenage years, she kept her daily struggles private.

There’s such a stigma surrounding mental health and if I could go back in time, I would give my younger self a big hug and tell her things get better,” Rizzo said.

Rizzo will be appearing at a book signing scheduled for 6 p.m. this Friday (Sept. 16) at Payden Park, just before the Derby High School football game.

Struggling To Fit In

In her middle school years Rizzo got her period before friends, underwent a growth spurt, and began to gain weight. In pictures, Rizzo would notice she looked bigger than some of her skinnier friends. Rizzo was a member of the cross-country team, first joining at 10 years old and continuing at Derby High School through senior year.

By eighth grade, she was obsessing over every calorie, carefully measuring the smallest dollop of peanut butter to spread on half an English muffin, rarely finishing it. 

In addition to running during practice and at meets, Rizzo would exercise relentlessly at home, even doing sit-ups in the shower. At 12 years old, Rizzo was 75 pounds.

Rizzo said her mom would sometimes tell her she was too skinny,” and at annual physicals, her doctor advised her to gain weight. 

The exhaustion from not eating enough and obsessively exercising, coupled with her already rigorous running schedule, came to a head one day during a career fair in the middle school gym. 

Rizzo fainted.

The cover of the memoir, which is sold on Amazon.

The next day, she said some mean girls called her anorexic.” They said boys wouldn’t date her.

Kids in middle school and high school can be very mean,” Rizzo said. It was very rough, but I brushed it off because people with eating disorders are very good liars. Their behaviors are very discreet. In middle school nobody said anything to me about how I was eating very little.”

Striving For Perfection

Upon entering freshman year at Derby High School, Rizzo was excited to be part of the cross-country team, but her daily struggles continued. 

She was running 45 miles a week, working out with the team, then coming home and exercising more. 

By her junior year her health was failing.

My immune system was so shot, I was sick at least once a month and had very low energy,” Rizzo said. I started the season strong but got a sinus infection that wouldn’t go away. I got sicker and sicker with chronic headaches and pretty much stopped eating.”

A Wake-Up Call

Rizzo was taken to the emergency room several times for what she described as chronic migraines. But it wasn’t until she went for a physical prior to starting her freshman year of college that Rizzo realized her life was in danger.

The doctor told me my heart rate was dangerously low. (He) was concerned I hadn’t gotten my period in three years, had very low blood pressure and said I could collapse at any point,” Rizzo said. I didn’t tell my parents the doctor told me I could collapse and die.”

Rizzo took her doctor’s recommendation to see a nutritionist. She also opted not to join the college cross-country team so she could take time for herself to get healthier.

I had some really uncomfortable conversations with the nutritionist, but she gave me instructions that I was able to follow,” Rizzo said. After a few months, I gained 20 pounds and got my period back.”

Rizzo said when she first started running at just 10 years old, she loved it, but as she pursued it later in her teen years, she began to have more of a love/hate relationship with the sport. 

A break is what she needed.

At the same time, Rizzo concentrated on the hard work of addressing her mental health issues. 

The nutritionist she saw helped with the eating issues. She sought group and individual therapy for her struggles with anxiety and a mood disorder.

Rizzo is now back to running for the sheer joy of running. She graduated this past May from Southern Connecticut State University and is now pursuing grad school to become a speech pathologist.

Writing a book about her early struggles was therapeutic for Rizzo. She credits being able to share her journey due to feedback she received via a running blog known as Ovals and Trails she often wrote on.

They (the blog posters) told me they felt like they weren’t alone, and that was really meaningful to me,” Rizzo said. I wrote the book because I wanted to tell my whole story.”

Rizzo also credits one of her former Derby High School teachers, Rebecca Bell, now an instructional coach, for helping her hone her writing skills.

Rizzo acknowledged Bell, and a few others who supported her, in the book, writing that Bell helped push her out of her comfort zone during high school, and gave her the guts to write about her very personal and private struggle with mental health.

I instantly got teary-eyed and filled with pride when I read the acknowledgement,” Bell said.. I knew she was working on telling her story. It can be scary to share any form of writing, but it takes courage to share such a personal story to help others.”

Rizzo said she hopes readers take away a sense that they, too, can overcome challenges.

If I didn’t eventually take care of my mental health, I wouldn’t be here today,” Rizzo said. I want people to know it’s worth it to recover, and there’s a whole world out there that’s much brighter now. I feel like I finally have a handle on it and am excited for my future.”

Derby Board of Education Chairman Jim Gildea is one of Rizzo’s biggest cheerleaders and set up the event.

I am fortunate to know Nicole and to have watched her mature through the years into the special adult that she is and now having added the accomplishment of being an author,” Gildea said. I have read the book and believe she tells an important story about the importance of one’s mental health, taking care of yourself and then sharing one’s story in order to help others. I find her and her story courageous, inspirational and necessary.”

Rizzo’s book is available to purchase on Amazon.

Click here to get information on eating disorders from the National Eating Disorders Association.


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