Mike Wood, a Shelton resident, contributing Shelton Herald columnist and area school teacher, just published his second book, “Mourning Wood: The Pre-Posthumously Early Work of Mike Wood.”
Click here for an explanation of the title.
Wood will be appearing at Plumb Memorial Library Wednesday (March 13) from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. to officially launch the kickoff of the drop date, which is Wednesday.
Wood participated in an e-mailed Q&A with the Valley Indy.
Yeah, it got weird.
Valley Indy: You’ve written a book that has something to do with pornography. Can you tell us how Ron Jeremy is doing and have you talked to him since his heart aneurysm?
Mike Wood: “The only thing my book has to do with pornography is that some of the stories run a little longer than you might need them to. As for Mr. Jeremy’s cardiac problems, the last time I saw him, he had a heart on, so I assume all is well.”
Valley Indy: There’s a photo on the back cover of your book. You’re in a coffin springing up, showing us you’re not really dead. People are laughing or at least looking interested. Except the guy in the plaid shirt. What’s his problem?
Wood: “That would be Shelton resident and Dunkin’ Donuts proprietor, Jeff Dymerski. His problem is no one told him I wasn’t really dead, and he was mad that he wore his “good plaid shirt” for nothing.”
Valley Indy: You once got into trouble for a column in the Huntington Herald asking why Huntington residents were so (multiple expletives deleted)? Do you regret saying that?
Wood: “Seeing as how the paper changed its name to the Shelton Herald soon after that column ran, I think some people owe me an apology.”
Valley Indy: Who’s the mayor of Huntington and what’s their form of government?
Wood: “Our de facto mayor is the Tai Chi Guy on the Green. Best I can tell, his favorite form is Step Back and Repulse the Monkey.”
Valley Indy: You’re last book took place in 1984. Do you think short shorts AND white tube socks for men will ever make a comeback? Keep in mind we’re not asking if just short shorts will come back. We know that will happen. We’re asking about the combo.”
Wood: “I’m confused. How can something make a comeback when it’s never gone out of style?”
Valley Indy: Shelton is named after Edward N. Shelton — but he moved to Derby when he was 24 years old. Why?
Wood: “Why did he move to Derby? Or why is Shelton named after him? Either way, the answer is drugs.”
Valley Indy: How many of the short stories in this book are about Shelton?
Wood: “None. Why would I write a story about Edward N. Shelton? Oh, you mean the city. In that case, the answer is one. Make that one and a half, as another takes place in Monroe, which is pretty much the same thing.”
Valley Indy: Man, this winter has been crazy.
Wood: “Perfect weather for reading the collected works of a local legend, I say!”
Valley Indy: At your fake wake for your book’s cover, did you have “The Body of an American” playing?
Wood: “No, but I WAS playing the body of an American!”
Valley Indy: Favorite season of “The Wire?”
Wood: “Spring.”
Valley Indy: The answer is season four.