It was a quick hello outside of St. Jude Church just a few weeks ago. Rich spotted me across the way and shouted, “Hi Joe. Are you still at Southern?”
“Hey Rich,” I responded. “Yeah, it’s going well.”
That’s how I remember it as both of us scurried inside so as not to be late for the start of Mass. Never did I dream it would be the last conversation we would have on this earth.
Richard A. Grande, the former mayor of Derby and one its proudest sons, died in the early Saturday morning hours at Yale-New Haven Hospital at the age of 59. The news of his passing in this tight-knit community spurred shock and tears, mitigated only by the joyful memories of his life, shared by so many people in the Valley.
“He was the best friend, my best man…just the best,” said childhood friend Mike McFarland, who knew Rich since second grade at St. Mary’s School. “Rich touched so many lives in a positive way – whether it was as mayor, as a respiratory therapist at Griffin Hospital, as a friend, and certainly as a wonderful husband and father.”
The former mayor was born in Derby Feb. 5, 1950, son of the late John D. and Carmella (Langello) Grande. A lifelong Derby resident, he was the husband of Mary Ann (Uhelsky) Grande and the father of Michelle (Grande) Peluso and her husband, Joseph Peluso.
He is also survived by a sister, Camille Kurtyka and her husband, George F. Kurtyka; father-in-law and mother-in-law, Stephen and Joan Uhelsky; sisters-in-law, Tonni Grande and Susan Trimarchi, and several cherished nieces, nephews and cousins, George Kurtyka, Stacey Kurtyka, Frank Rubino, Jr., John Grande, Michael Trimarchi and Rachel Trimarchi. He is predeceased by his brother, John F. Grande, and a sister, Lucille A. Rubino, and her husband, Frank A. Rubino, Sr..
McFarland recalls a time from their college days when they would travel to Cape Cod with a few friends for a week each summer. They would stay in a cleaned up tool shed. “But Rich was always so polite and a gentleman, even as a young man, that our friend’s mother insisted that he sleep in the house, while the rest were told to go out to the tool shed.”
McFarland and Grande remained friends for the rest of their lives. In fact, after Grande was elected mayor in November 1985, McFarland became part of his “cabinet,” a group of his most trusted advisors.
It was early in his administration that our paths first crossed.
I had been working part-time at The Evening Sentinel during my senior year at Southern Connecticut State University. In June 1986, I became The Sentinel’s full-time Derby reporter.
From the outset, I remember Rich being accessible to the press and the public. In fact, I would call him at City Hall most mornings at our agreed upon time of about 7:30. And true to his word, he would take those to answer my questions about the latest news developments in the city.
That was valuable for an afternoon newspaper like The Sentinel with morning deadlines. At the same time, it was a good communication opportunity for his administration. That didn’t mean he liked every story we would write, and certainly not some of the editorials that the paper produced.
But he didn’t run and hide, nor try to “punish” the press by withholding availability. In the long run, that kind of open communication in good times and bad – benefitted everyone – the paper, its readers and the mayor. That is a lesson that so many of our nation’s politicians – then and now — can learn.
Rich’s early morning hours at City Hall usually came after pulling the night shift at Griffin Hospital, where he worked for many years as a respiratory therapist. He often pulled himself away from the mayor’s office by afternoon to get perhaps three or four hours of shut eye on a good day and then return in the evenings to attend public meetings, which in those days, often spanned three, four, even five hours.
“He didn’t take many vacations, either, especially during his first few years as mayor,” recalled Joe Moore, who served as president of the Board of Aldermen during part of Grande’s mayoral tenure. “He had an unbelievable amount of energy and an incredible work ethic, especially since the job was, in theory, part time. But he treated it as if it were full time because of his love for the city.”
Ron Sill, a Derby High School classmate of Rich who began a 24-year run as an alderman in 1986, agreed. “He gave the job 110 percent – it was always about Derby,” Sill said. “And he had Derby on his mind right up until the end of his life. In fact, only a few weeks before he died, he talked about getting involved with the Democratic Town Committee again.”
Both Moore and Sill also pointed to Grande’s openness with the Board of Aldermen as important in establishing a good relationship between the executive and legislative bodies, especially during his second and third terms.
Grande previously had stints on the Board of Aldermen and Board of Apportionment and Taxation, before seeking the endorsement of the Democratic Town Committee for mayor in 1983. While he lost that bid, he would gain the party nomination and the mayor’s office just two years later. Voters re-elected him in 1987 and 1989.
During his 6‑year tenure, he supported several successful referendum initiatives, such as those associated with funding a new Derby High School roof, a new Derby Police Department facility and the purchase of the Fountain Lake property near the Ansonia/Derby/Seymour line.
Of course, as all administrations do, he also suffered some setbacks.
After all, Derby has a history of some rough-and-tumble politics and the 1980s and ’90s were no exception. The mayor and the aldermen would sometimes clash with the tax board on various municipal issues. Both sides were passionate in their positions. The mayor won some, lost some and some resulted in a happy medium. But regardless of politics or disagreements on issues, few, if any, doubted Rich’s dedication to the city and his sincerity in wanting to do right by Derby.
This warm and kind-hearted man genuinely loved his hometown. His creation of the Olde Derby Day festival — which once attracted thousands of people — was a good example of his efforts to showcase Derby to the rest of the state.
And now the community which he so loved has an opportunity to say its final good byes.
Friends are invited to greet the family at the Edward F. Adzima Funeral Home, 253 Elizabeth St., Derby, on Tuesday from 3 to 7 p.m.
On Wednesday, a Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated at 11 a.m. at St. Jude Church, 71 Pleasant View Road, Derby.
Burial will follow at Mount St. Peters Cemetery in Derby. Contributions can be made to the Griffin Hospital Development Fund, 130 Division St., Derby, and to St. Jude Church, 71 Pleasant View Road, Derby, CT 06418.
Rich, I chronicled countless stories about you and the city during your reign as mayor of Derby. I never imagined having to write this one – certainly not so soon.
Farewell to a proud Derby resident who bled red and white his entire life.
God Bless.
(Joe Musante worked for The Evening Sentinel from 1985 to 1992 and for the Connecticut Post from 1993 to 2000. He is currently assistant director of public affairs at Southern Connecticut State University.)
